Gents, we're often accused of being unable to do anything culinary other than burning steaks on a charcoal grill or making peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches. I don't think this reputation is fair, but the ladies may have a point or two in their favor. For instance, I've yet to meet a man who owns a recipe box - one of those wooden dust-gatherers where you keep index cards with step-by-step instructions for making pies, cakes and casseroles. I don't know too many men who wear floral aprons either, but let's stick to the recipe problem. Go out in your wood shop and build a little recipe box. You can probably make it in a week for under $300 if you don't get too fancy with the inlays and the dove-tail joints. Then, cut out the three recipes below and tape them on index cards. We'll show the ladies that we can play this game, too.
David's Breakfast Surprise: First, get in the car. Then, drive to the nearest diner and order anything on the breakfast menu. If you'd like, you can add a pinch of sugar to this recipe. Just say, "No one scribbles down an order like you do, Sugar!" Don't add any sugar if your wife goes with you.
That Writer Guy's Business Lunch: This is an easy recipe that doesn't require a car. First, go to the cupboard and find a jar of peanut butter and some Pop-Tarts. Second, open them both. Here's where the creativity comes in. You can either mush it all up in a cereal bowl, or you can put peanut butter between two Pop-Tarts and make a sandwich. Brush your teeth when you finish.
Mr. McCoy's Dinner Delight: This is one of my personal favorites. First, get in the car. Then, drive to the nearest All-You-Can-Eat catfish house. Order the special. You can add some honey to this recipe if you want. Just say, "Honey, keep that iced tea coming, and don't let my hush puppy plate run dry!" Again, use the honey sparingly - if at all - should your wife go with you as you use this recipe.
This should get you started. Think up your own quick meal tips and make sure you show your new recipe box off down at the hardware store. Just don't wear an apron, OK?
David McCoy, a notorious storyteller and proud Yellow Jacket, lives in Conyers and can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.