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Clemons: All kinds of records were made to be broken
If First Baptist youth want to get back in Guinness, they have a lot of opportunity
Largest Batman Collection
Brad Ladner, of Roswell, Ga., has the world's largest collection of Batman memorabilia. It was at 8,226 different items as of April 11, 2015. - photo courtesy of Guinness World Records

Covington, we made the record books.

First Baptist Church received verification Thursday it set the record for the world’s largest whoopee cushion. Guinness World Records confirmed the record-setting, um, inflation from back in August.

Matt Funk and Lee Burgess are now in the record book, or at least on the Guinness website. Their cushion measured 7.62 meters and was inflated with help from students from the church.

That beat the old record by some folks in New Zealand. They probably feel like someone knocked the wind out of them.

Our managing editor, Jackie Gutknecht, covered the big event — followed by a deflation that would make Tom Brady proud — back on Aug. 5. Jackie also was on hand Thursday as they received the coveted plaque from Guinness.

One of the participants said we’re going to stay in the record books, even suggesting going for the record for most people duct-taped to a wall. Guinness doesn’t have an actual record for that, maybe because a Google search revealed some injuries.

I did find that 752 people is the record for most people gathered in one place and wearing duct tape. That happened in Knoxville, Tennessee, in 2014. Surely our competitive spirt would allow us all this close to Athens to beat a record from Knoxville, couldn’t it?

We’ll pretend that duct tape was orange.

The largest whoopee cushion is Covington’s only entry into the record book — at least for now — but Georgia’s well-represented.

Dr. Crawford W. Long, the former hospital namesake, removed a cyst from the neck of James Venable in Jefferson in 1842 to become the first physician to perform a surgery using general anesthesia.

The largest collection of Batman memorabilia in the world resides in Roswell, in the care of Brad Ladner. He had 8,226 different items as of April 11, 2015.

Atlanta is the home of two records you probably have experienced: the busiest airport, Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International, and the longest freestanding escalator, at CNN Center.

Four world records were set down in Eatonton, for “stacking” by William Orrell. He set three individual records and a doubles record in the world championships down there. (Stacking is done with cups. Think the Anna Kendrick video, but faster and way less charming.)

The late mother of a man I go to church with made Guinness World Records twice as a matter of fact. Besse Cooper became the world’s oldest living person on Jan. 31, 2011, at 114 years, 158 days old. Guinness presented the plaque and she got a visit in her Monroe nursing home from Gov. Nathan Deal, then it was discovered there was a woman even older — by 48 days — living in Brazil.

Sure enough, that woman died and Cooper was the oldest again within a couple of months.

She died Dec. 4, 2012, at 116 years, 100 days old. She was only the eighth person on record at the time to make it to 116 years old.

If we ever have anyone make it anywhere near that old, perhaps we could celebrate with a large birthday cake. Just know, it’s going to have to be pretty dadgum big to crack Guinness.

During my time in Fort Payne, Alabama, the newspaper office displayed pictures from the city’s centennial celebration with its record cake. (Randy Owen of country supergroup Alabama is someone you might recognize from the photos.)

The city’s largest employer then, a bakery, was heavily involved in making a 128,238-pound, 12-layer cake that was 2,560 square feet and took up most of the exhibit space at the fairgrounds.

That record currently is not monitored by Guinness, but it’s still on the website.

Keep an eye out for First Baptist.

“I would love to go for another one,” youth minister Matt Funk said. “It was really fun and memorable for the students.”

David Clemons is the editor and publisher of The Covington News. His email address is Twitter: @scoopclemons.