For a guy more uptight than a bullfrog in boiling water, State Sen. Majority Leader Chip Rogers, R-Woodstock, can be a hoot. I first discovered this when he and another senator named Chip (Pearson, from Dawsonville) teamed up a few years ago to pass a bill in the Senate banning our body parts from being micro-chipped without our permission. I thought that was pretty funny: Chip, Chip and Microchip. Get it?
I wrote that when the bill passed the senate, Rogers was so ecstatic, he was seen running up and down the halls at the capitol yelling, "I am Mork ...
Have you ever heard of Florida International University? I must admit they don't come to mind when talking about institutions of higher learning. Perhaps that is because I think first of the University of Georgia, the oldest state-chartered university in the nation, located in Athens, the Classic City of the South, current state football champions and home to 18 Rhodes Scholars. Woof! Woof!
I write to applaud you for having made it through another year in Georgia's public schools. Good for you. Frankly, I wonder sometimes why you do what you do and then I remember that you are changing young lives for the better. Not many of us can make that claim.
Your rewards for your efforts are unpaid furlough days, larger class sizes, no pay increases (but increased expenses) and a second-guessing public that seems to feel you should be able to stop all of society's ills at the classroom door. And then there are the politicians who promote ...
Skeeter Skates, owner of Skeeter's Tree Stump Removal and Plow Repair in Metropolitan Pooler, called me this week. That was a historic occasion. Maybe not man-landing on-the-moon historic, but pretty close to it. Skeeter rarely ever calls. I think it is because he thinks he knows everything. Being an industry leader in the tree stump removal and plow repair game can do that to a person.
Just when my life seemed to have lost all meaning, up jumps our Ambassador to Outer Space Cynthia McKinney, who has announced her intentions to run for Congress as a member of the Green Party this fall in Georgia's 4th District.
This is quite a comedown for Miss Moonbeam, who was the Green Party's candidate for president in 2008. But incumbent Democratic Rep. Hank Johnson has impressive space cadet credentials himself. In 2010, Johnson expressed concern in a congressional hearing about a planned military buildup on the Pacific island of Guam, saying, "My fear is that the whole ...
While May 1st is designated Law Day in the United States, Judge Lisa Godbey Wood, chief judge of the U.S. Southern District of Georgia, says we Americans should remember that every day is a day of law in this country. There would be anarchy without it.
I had the privilege of following Judge Wood on a program in Savannah a couple of weeks ago and I have never heard anyone explain our system of law better or with more passion than she did. When it was my turn to speak, I felt like Tiny Tim and his ukulele following ...
Dear Governor, I know you have been waiting to hear how I think you are handling things these days, but I wanted to give you time to get the legislators out of town and to be sure all the silverware is accounted for. Plus, I have been busy trying to help your pal, Leroy Gingrich, understand he has blown his chances of becoming President of the United States and that he might want to go back to Washington and moonlight as the Pillsbury Doughboy.
I like your low-key style and the way you are willing to work with both parties ...
I tend to daydream. Sometimes I look at the shape of the clouds above me and I can see a tea kettle or maybe the little fat guy that used to run North Korea. And then sometimes I just close my eyes and think of headlines I would like to see, such as:
President Obama says teleprompters make him say dumb things
"Members of the Legislature, my name is Figby and I have been asked by House Speaker Dennis Ralston - he is the gentleman over in the corner eating the Twinkie - along with Senators Tommie Williams and Chip Rogers to discuss some potential campaign issues this fall. They are, of course, your leaders and have helped make the General Assembly what it is today.
At the risk of sounding like Johnny One-Note, let me go back over my concerns one more time about the charter school constitutional amendment bill in the State Senate that may or may not have been passed by the time this gets to you. (My deadlines and legislative deadlines don't always coincide.)
Rep. Joe Wilkinson (R-Sandy Springs) has figured out something many of his colleagues in the General Assembly seem unable to grasp: If you disagree with something I say, tell me so and give me your side of the story.
I seem to have an innate ability to make folks mad. Usually, it is the humor-impaired and special interest twits. Today, I hope to make everybody mad, no matter your race, creed, color or university affiliation. This diatribe is for all.
In order to keep my national certification as a modest and much-beloved columnist, I am required to submit annually a State of the Column message. Thank you for your patience and understanding. Please stand and applaud if you hear something that floats your boat or look bored if you don't. You may be on television.