It was as ugly as a wart hog, but for the 11th time in the past 12 years, 38 of the past 50, and 65 out of 108, the University of Georgia, the oldest state-chartered university in the nation, located in Athens, the Classic City of the South, has bested You-Know-Where Institute of Technology for the State Football Championship, 41-34.
Knock! Knock! Knock!
Last week, family and friends gathered in the small town of Chattahoochee Hills, south of Atlanta, to celebrate a life well-lived. Our late grandson, Zack Wansley, was honored at the dedication of "Zack's Glade," a pristine and picturesque piece of Cochran Mill Park near where he died while training for the Atlanta Marathon in 2008.
TO: UGA PRESIDENT JERE MOREHEAD RE: WELCOME ABOARD Dear Dr. Morehead: Congratulations on your investiture as the 22nd president of the University of Georgia. I wish I could be there for the ceremony Nov. 19, but I have a long-scheduled conflict on that day. Otherwise, I would be there barking "Woof! Woof!" to show my pleasure in having you officially recognized as the leader of my beloved alma mater. This solemn occasion probably doesn't lend ...
I have some good news and some bad news. I read in the paper recently about a proposed venture to send people to Mars. The good news is that it will be a one-way trip. The bad news is that the launch isn't scheduled until 2022, meaning anybody dumb enough to consider the idea of going to Mars and staying there will be hanging around for another nine years on our planet and lowering the collective IQ for the rest of us. Bummer.
Ring! Ring! Ring!
I called Junior E. Lee, general manager of the Yarbrough Worldwide Media and Pest Control Co., located in Greater Garfield, Ga., to see what kind of reactions he was getting from the public to the recent shutdown of the federal government.
Bummer. I just learned that I did not win the Nobel Peace Prize again this year. This is getting old. I was so confident this time that I had my tuxedo pressed and new laces put in my Converse Chuck Taylor All-Star high-top sneakers.
After a friend told me she had waited 3½ hours recently to get her Georgia driver's license renewed and then had to deal with a clerk that could have passed for a robot - and an unhelpful one, at that - I thought this to be a typical example of a bunch of government bureaucrats who don't care because they don't have to.
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Despite the rants of publicity-seeking bigots, the blather of Twitter twits and a national news media more interested in scooping the competition than in accurate reporting, the fact is that our American system of justice presumes one is innocent until proven guilty.
It looks like our legislators are about to lose one of their most cherished perks: free football tickets. Bless their hearts.
Dear Syrian Rebels: I thought I'd take a minute to correspond with you as you resume your efforts to overthrow Syrian dictator Bashar Assad. You are no doubt disappointed that the United States government chose not to come to your aid as it promised.
It is flattering to have readers tell me I should run for public office. There are also an equal number of adoring fans who say I should stick my head in a bucket of tar. But that is a topic for another day.
Rats! As if creating this profound and pithy prose each week weren't hard enough, now I have discovered a legislator with a sense of humor. The apocalypse is upon us. As those of you who have followed this space over the years know well and those of you who are new to it will soon discover, I feed on the humor-impaired like a possum on a sweet potato, especially puffed-up politicians. I enjoy pricking their ...
Please indulge me a moment of introspection and feel free to think along with me. Chances are what I am going to say may apply to you as well.
As if public education in Georgia doesn't have enough problems, there is now a high-profile ruckus between Gov. Nathan Deal and State School Superintendent Dr. John Barge. It has gotten so peevish that there is talk that the school superintendent may challenge Deal in the Republican gubernatorial primary next spring.
You may have read that the United States Supreme Court is going to hear a case about whether or not prayer can be uttered in town councils across America. Last year, a federal appeals court ruled that such a nefarious deed violated the First Amendment's ban on an "establishment of religion."
Dear Public School Teachers: As you head back to the classroom for the new school year, I would like to tell you that things have changed for the better, but I would be fibbing. Budgets will continue to shrink, classroom sizes will increase, and the ignoramuses among us will still expect you to close the door on society's ills and magically educate the next generation. Don't expect any help from the Legislature. The Atlanta Journal-Constitution's ...
I read recently in the Atlanta newspapers that our intrepid public servants just keep on going - on trips, that is.
After much posturing, the General Assembly passed a sleeves-out-of-their-vests piece of legislation on lobbying reform in the last session and wants us to believe it has answered our concerns. Not so.
There is no way I could produce such pithy and thought-provoking essays each week without the help of my columnist commandos.
I try to make it a habit to hang around with smart people. Given that my IQ is not much larger than my waistline, this isn't difficult to do.
When Jimmy Carter ran for the state Senate in 1961 and was defeated, he claimed voter fraud. Carl Sanders, president pro tem of the state Senate, supported Carter's claim and provided legal counsel from the Democratic Party. Carter prevailed.
This is a story about heroes - good people doing good things. The cast of characters in this performance shares one thing in common: They are strangers to one another.